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The unwanted love 
My Name Fie,simple 18,loving the piano and a very quiet personnot emookay i'm in PTE Meragang UPPER 6 :), i'm such a quiet i mean a quiet person... but memajal i have the tendency to stalk blogs because i'm always outdated and lost and i have this fanatics on mythology ♥ ( i know i'm weird ), and this addiction to vampires.. they're so interesting to me :) I'M OFFICIALLY WEIRD! AND LOVING IT ♥ Chat Links perfectoneword.
Faizah♥♥ Read more August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 |
love story - Friday, January 29, 2010 10:05 PM i been listening to the song love story by taylor swift, somehow i'm still addicted, i'm not yet asleep still doing a bit of geography and study a little of psychology, did a little recording of two songs , i'm Happy ...TEE loved the song i gave her like i promise i would :) as her advance birthday present. i've been having weird dreams lately so weird because it was about the "UPCOMING RESULTS" i was flipping at some papers on a bulletin board so weird,~ scary, i know everyone scared~! Today Friday, same as always, i miss music school~ i miss my old teacher, I'm excited for SUNDAY~ !  JOBLESS~ i'm missing you, quietly, i'm missing you, silently, i'm loving you, till god knows when, i'm sorry, for the pain, i'm crying inside, as i lie a smile on my face a friend made me realize the truth of me, that hurts alot but i owe him because a chance to change is something big, to be better and to learn, i thank you ~ so much for hitting me the truth~ "truth hurts, that how it is" and m learning to accept its true so i won't deny it anymore~ 14th february 2009~ lovely rose~ PTEM Open day - Thursday, January 21, 2010 7:25 PM Today was the official of the school open day, there were so many exhibitions , activities , tour for everyone and the upcoming juniors . With this open day I think the upcoming student might have some idea what they will face in form 6 , how lucky of them :). Music club have their own jamming session at the ampitheatre , it was tiring but fun, i was really HAPPY to see Tara , its been ages i didn't see her its like years but its only been 1 month, haha, then meeting for the first time her best friend Fida, really felt like we known each other for a while :) i can see that she and tara are alike. I can say PTEM is almost full of students from different school, really confusing, and some registered early for the music club was greatful of that. then things ended by 4 everyone started to go home, really was a tiring fun day. But one things for sure, i get this funny feeling everytime i see him, its feels like the first time I saw him , seeing him talking to my mom , my aunt, and my cousin Fai is like i'm missing what i missed the most : getting along. i've been missing badly, hiding myself away , pretending everything okay, In my heart I felt so true no one could ever replaced him in my heart, the way he is , the way he acts, though i tried so hard to forget him but nothing ever did work, giving my heart to someone else is not working. I end up being the way I am right now. I'm selfishly regretting everything i done that Hurt him , that made him sad and cry. Now i know how he once felt yet i'm so foolish. *sigh* i don't mind if he likes someone or in love with someone else, as long as he happy the way he is, i can't chase him although it feels like I WANT to chase him more than anything , i screw up my chances and thats it. but i'm afraid i lost already. :'( clearly i need him in my life if there a last chance being with you  i keep these petals in a box , though it withers and dry it remind me being with you was the happiest time in my life, its you - Thursday, January 07, 2010 6:07 AM you gave hope when i fall down you gave me light when it's dark, you gave me joy when i feel sorrow you gave me everything to make me smile. you were once my everything i dream and everything i wish for i was happy being with you, i will cherish the moments with you. Although the story ends, Just like fashion trends, yet my heart won't stop telling me is not the end. i fall for you again, when i am lost without you, story from far, story from near. hearing about you really hurts me dear. i hear some hates you, i hear some loves you, i hear this gossips, sometimes i wish they could stop it is what i'm missing, is a wish i'm chasing, yet its hopeless for all i've done. just makes me restless. here i am staying far away, locking myself away, hiding myself away, from everyone. the truth pricks like thorn, the lie i wish that wasn't done, counting months days and week. i'm really so weak this sounds lame i feel ashamed, this is so sick and hurting my conscience say stop blurting. i am blurting out all on this poem~ till it just stop me from hurting inside, thanks for it - Wednesday, January 06, 2010 11:58 PM i seem to be doing geography tonight , because i've been out after school finishes at 3 (extended geography class), well today nothing much changes pretty normal but i had a feeling i'm changing the way i study, i think its going to be better this year. but what is it that i miss and need the most? i don't know i had this feeling when i flipped the piano theory book, it made me missing something i need the most , something i love, yet why does it feels like i want to cry but i can't cry? maybe i'm missing the teacher too , who taught me since i was a little girl giving me hope, not giving up . tonight been helping with sara doing some duty roster for her class =), i miss teacher shamala , *random* some things are better hidden, some things are better left unsaid, some things i wish it could be the same but wishing that is hopeless, loving you from far~1jan2009 dear bloggy - Sunday, January 03, 2010 9:52 PM dear bloggy, i've been neglecting because i do not know what to post, new year 2010 was awesome being with my girlfriend(best friend) and family the best ever... tonight is the last night i'm going to spend on the laptop and the next day will be a fresh start, with the same old fie i guess?..currently online, when one of my friend bring the topic back up about previous relationships... talking about that, saying it out what i truly feel, saying out what the bad things i done to him, saying it out everyting about the truth, made me realize how much i lost , how much i regret, how much i hurt, how much everything it is that really sucks that i didn't realize what i done, why did i do that? that the questions,,? "dear cinderella you made your choice, its too late and now your just being a peasant girl once more"..i can imagine that.. today 2010, i'm still not over it "i might have like someone, you may take everything from me, but one thing you'll never get from me is my heart because i'm not over the last one~..." i'm so feeling lost and depress because of this i lost my appetitie i lost myself tonight i didn;t eat the whole day, because this is so messed up, i think this is it..my geography all messed up by me ~! |
